How Harry Potter Could Have Ended

I. Love. Harry. Potter.

Honestly, it is the best series I have ever read in my entire life. And that is saying something, because I like to read alot (See more about the Alot here.). The writer, J.K. Rowling, has been able to immerse millions of children into a different world like no other author has before.

In fact, I love Harry Potter so much, it can sometimes get a bit creepy.

Anyway, I was thinking about Harry Potter, and I realized that the series did not need to end the way it did. Well, I mean, the end would have been the same, with Voldemort dying and all that jazz. But I feel like it should have gone a little more like this:

So, that happened...

I've been having a bit of a doozie trying to figure out how to be writing my posts. This is probably going to end up being a comedic blog, as I have this serious sass problem that I can only overcome by writing.

Anyway, the style of that last post, with the pictures and everything, was inspired by the blog Hyperbole and a Half, a hilarious blog that my AP Composition teacher showed us on the last day of class. Be sure to check it out!

I'm not sure how the whole cartoon thing worked out, but I did like the idea of representing myself with this little freak:

Are you trying to be cool!?!? No, no, NO! STOP THAT! And take off the stupid glasses, too.

Now, I know what you're thinking: "Wait, did he just have an argument with a cartoon version of himself?"


Yes, yes I did.


Now shut up.


Oh! And speaking of AP Composition, I learned on the last day of class that the origination of the word "jelly" comes from a word that meant "vagina."
This morning I ended up having this conversation with my mom:

It was too much. 


So anyway, I don't know what to really write about on this blog, but it'll probably end up being stuff that happens to me and my opinions on certain things. If it's the latter, you better watch out: sass problem, remember?

Pistachios

I love pistachios. Honestly, they are like little green, crunchy bits of heaven. When my mom buys pistachios, I can't wait until I get the chance to gobble them up.

There's just one problem: they're quite mean. I mean, think about it, even their name sounds like "pissed at you."

They'll start out being nice. You pick one up, you crack its shell open, and they happily let you eat them. In fact, they usually want you to eat them so much that they even leave their shell partially open to make it easier for you to crack.

But then sometimes, this happens.

You try...

And try...

And try...

But the little poopface just refuses to open!
The only way to solve this problem is to insult them until they have to choice to open.

New Blog

Hey you!
Yeah, you. The one with the face.
Just Kidding...well, I mean, I'm assuming you have a face. But if you don't listen all the same.
I just wanted to welcome you to my blog. I had another one before, and I want to continue on that blog, but I decided not to.
But here I am, making my New Years' Resolution (a month into the new year) that I will make this blog as fantastic as it can be.
But now that this stupid introductory post is over, this blog is going to kick major BUTT.
Fasten your seatbelts, put on your diapers, and grab your loved ones (and their money).
It's going to be one heck of a ride.